What rhythm are you in?

Written by
Changeboard Team

27 Aug 2010

27 Aug 2010 • by Changeboard Team

Pressing the pause button

We have all heard the saying (or something similar) that what we do today becomes our tomorrow - but how many of us pay actual attention to this in regards our own lives, what we do in them, how we operate at work and interact with others?

If we want to truly effect change, have things different, or alter what we are currently receiving in our working or personal lives, rather than delving into and dwelling upon the past with remorse or regret and self-sabotage, comparing ourselves to others and then racing fast-forwards into the future setting countless goals based upon ideal ways of being or working - how about just pressing the pause button for a moment and taking valuable time to reflect and then simply change our current and next choice - that then becomes our future-in-making?

Sounds straight forward and easy, right?

Turning down the speed to stop

What prevents us from doing this?

The problem is that most of us do not want to adjust our speed or stop as we are just too busy working, managing, planning, resolving, setting, worrying, thinking thoughts that convince us that we need to be busy to look like we are going places, achieving because if we are not being busy then we must be lazy or not aspiring to better things or opportunities, and so drive ourselves to the point where we can miss what is right there in front of us...

Sometimes a job redundancy can be the necessary stop to re-view and re-assess how we are living/working. Sometimes its a personal break up, an ending of a business, sometimes conflict at work all creating anxiousness, tension, stress that affects sleep patterns. It could also be physical like an injury, accident or operation. And sometimes it can be a mix of the aforementioned which can hit us like a steam-roller train yet we still continue in the same way as before - making the same choice that leads to another same choice being repeated over that becomes a pattern that is being reinforced sometimes after many years. It seems we can never arise out of the ugliness that is around us, something that we have created - through all our choices.

The reality for most of us is that if we do stop (and only if we are truly honest), we are able to openly see just what we have and have been choosing and hence the state of being or the rhythm we are in. It is much easier to steam-roller on ahead ignoring or denying the signs, being dishonest and in choosing blindly we keep ourselves in the/our distraction of busyness, thinking and believing everything is OK when in truth the picture might not be a rosy one at all.

Acknowledgment in how we are operating

The first step

If we can first acknowledge the state we are in at each moment eg. annoyed, angry, anxious, stressed, disillusioned, envious or jealous etc then we become aware or conscious of how we are and the way in which we are operating. We are then able to affect adversely or otherwise, our next moment of choice that becomes a foundation of our next moment that is, our future.

In speed, we can easily override or be dismissive of how we are feeling and in the motion can make quick and hasty decisions that are simply knee-jerk reactions to what is occurring around us which we have taken on or absorbed.

It is an emotional way of being and this rhythm of behaviour skews our clarity to make true choices which can end up costing us an awful lot through lost business, clients, revenues, productivities, or wrong hiring decisions etc.

Speed does not = destination

Speed does not = destination - though you might get there - but at what cost to you?

In reactionary speed we can easily skim, ignore, consciously gloss over or deny things that are sticking out like a sore thumb. In not taking note or stock, all size errors can occur and there is an abdication of (full) responsibility to self and also to others in our rush to get to the finish line which becomes our excuse and also for our behaviour.

Its similar to racing to catch a bus in order to make a meeting having consciously left ourselves pushed or short for time (because we were finishing off something), there being red traffic lights along the way, alighting and pounding the streets to make it in time. We arrive on the dot... and we are so happy about this (that the client will know this too), but we arrive hot under the collar, heart racing, puffed out and our sides aching. 

To what extent has this marathon journey taxed or stressed the physical and mental state? How did that meeting then go? What if we had made the choice to down-tools earlier, or factored in time that this pressurised way of being/living did not negatively impact upon self (and others).

Is this really a job well-done if it has been achieved through such a constrained and driven way that is so depleting?

The finish line

In wanting to desperately reach for the finish line whether that be the promotion, job search, a job, new career, a course or degree, new client, business deal, new enterprise launch, company floatation etc - we max ourselves out and finish in an exhausted heap having burnt the candle at both ends along the way. Yet often a void can still be felt within before we then choose to do it all over again (serial entrepreneurs/or serial anything) to try and satisfy it/us. And so the rhythm of that choice continues.

Should we run and blindly accept this (disharmonious) way of being, then we must also accept that we receive all that has been arising from, and also as a result of this disharmonious way of operating which is inefficient since it exhausts our energy.

Nourishment...if it is exhausted it no longer has life

If there is no love, what then? 

(Leonardo Da Vinci)

If we have any disharmony in our present, then could it be because of what we prior chose that was also disharmony?  for (the rhythm of) our past creates (the rhythm of) our future.

What is your rhythm right now

Self-love or self-sabotage?

If the rhythm or state or way in which we are in right now follows that which will determine the next second/minute/hour/day/week etc - then just how important is it to be aware of how we are currently and then make different or new choices towards that which is harmonious - should this be what we want, since there are many who thrive or say that operate better under stress or pressure.

We can choose to stop the pattern of ill-choices that have not been self-regarding (ie self-loving) through observing what is happening all around us and using it and others as our mirror to reflect back to us. From this we can choose to learn and make fresh new choices of self-harmony or self-love as our basis for the next choice(s).

Mirror of reflection

Have you ever noticed that the brusque hurried person who knocked past you on your way to work, the angry beep of a car horn happened the same day that you missed your bus, or the tube was delayed and you ended up feeling just like that person?! Or maybe you were in this way already - and that person was your mirror of reflection?!

The way in which we carry out our jobs and operate in life, interact with people, colleagues, clients, bosses, write emails, pitch for business, attend interview, deliver a sales target, shop, eat, drink, brush our teeth, shave, dress ourselves etc is from a chain of personal choices made that deliver to us our chosen state of being or rhythm which then affects (or infects) everything and everyone around us. This we know as the ripple effect.

So if your bus arrives as you approach the stop, the tube enters as you reach the platform, the office lift is present, someone opens the door for you just as you get there and your business deal or working day flows effortlessly then appreciate the reflection you are showing yourself. Make the next choice count the way you want towards harmony that is also love. Simple.